When time is running out

There and back again

I woke up in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU) of CMC Vellore Hospital, one of the best hospitals in southern India, with an oxygen mask on my nose to ensure breathing and 3 broken ribs. The body was filled with opium derivative pain medicines. Breathing was difficult, shallow, and painful.

All doctors and professors agreed that a miracle had happened to me. What they had observed was simply not possible: I had no heart or brain damage, even after I had been clinically dead for nearly 40 minutes.

What had happened at the end of 2018?

Returning to India from a visa jump to Singapore, I found myself suddenly with Hepatitis A (liver infection). I can only assume from food or water. I consulted a local hospital in Tiruvannamalai, South India, and the doctor on duty gave me an antibiotic shot. Unfortunately I am allergic to penicillin, of which - to be fair - I wasn’t aware at the time. So I went into anaphylactic shock. My heart stopped, I fell down.. and was dead.

A friend of mine who had kindly accompanied me to the hospital was the first one to jump into action and pumped my heart, even before the nurses did. God bless her! As I was told later, one of India’s most beloved saints, Shirdi Sai Baba, appeared to her in a vision in which he carried me under his arm and told her that he will bring me back. He surely did!

People ask me what I saw while I was on the other side: I am sorry to disappoint, but I didn’t see any angels. No light. And nobody was waiting on the other side with champagne to pick me up and guide me to the party. - It was very peaceful though. No awareness of any pains. And pitch darkness.

As it was explained later, when we die through any kind of shock - e.g. via accident, suicide or whatsoever - we find ourselves blind on the other side. So, though I found it fully okay for such a (subjectively) short time period, it might not have been so pleasant for a longer time. One needs a strong soul to pick them out of such a Limbus.

What I do remember though, while floating in darkness: at one point, I opened my eyes. And what I could see was my beloved teacher Pal Pandian in the room! Was I dreaming?

The room was filled with radiant light, and his eyes looked like beaming torches. He lovingly did hold a hand over my head, and it felt like he pushed my soul back into my body. - Only he and Baba know what really happened, and it remains a mystery to me.

My master was indeed physically there in the hospital to save me. In his humbleness, he fully gave all credits to Baba, confirming that Baba brought me back. “You still have work to do,” have been his words, ringing in my ears even now.

No words can describe the beauty of Pal Pandian, who shares his warmth like the sun with everybody.

More about Baba

It totally was divine grace and intervention which led to my rebirth.

Shirdi Sai Baba, who is nothing but love and compassion, has blessed me with many wonder-ful experiences. Some more subtle then others. This one surely was not subtle at all. Thank you, Baba!

I will share more blissful incidents in the future.

Many of the readers have their own connection with Shirdi Baba, and have witnessed his helpful interventions. But for some who might not be that familiar with this most amazing incarnation of Dattatreya - meaning, Brahma, Vishnu, Shiva in one - such sharing could not just inspire, but also give hope. We are not alone!

Baba gave the following eleven assurances:

·       Whoever puts his feet on Shirdi soil, his sufferings would come to an end.

·       The wretched and miserable would rise into plenty of joy and happiness, as soon as they climb the steps of my Mosque.

·       I shall be ever active and vigorous even after leaving this earthly body.

·       My tomb shall bless and speak the needs of my devotees.

·       I shall be active and vigorous even from my tomb.

·       My mortal remains would speak from my tomb.

·       I am Ever living to help and guide all, who come to me, who surrender to me and who seek refuge in me.

·       If you look at me I look at you.

·       If you cast your burden on me, I shall surely bear it.

·       If you seek my advice and help, it shall be given to you at once.

·       There shall be no want in the house of my devotees.

Which other soul ever did give such assurances?

Jai Sai Ram

About love

I would like to share another experience with Baba that I had in 2019: Indian friends, who are sincere devotees, sent me 2 blessed objects from the samadhi of Shirdi Sai Baba. When I took the bag in my hand, the energy in the objects acted like a catalyst, and my heart literally "exploded". Stronger than any healer I have ever experienced (and I have literally met hundreds in my life), and at the same time deeply tender and gentle, an indescribably strong love flowed not only from/in my heart and all body cells. No, this heart energy was so strong that a meter-wide, quasi electro-magnetic force field - a love field - built up around me. Space and time disappeared, as did my mind. I was a living prayer: this describes it best. All of my pains disappeared, healed.

When I then went into Ramanashram for meditation and came out again, a woman suddenly stopped her scooter on the street. She felt this field, this intense love, flowing out of me. It was the deepest God or Self experience I have ever had so far. This woman stood in front of me for a while with her eyes closed to breathe in the love. It was very important for me as a confirmation that this experience was "real". Afterwards, I went to a supermarket, and there, too, people at the checkout turned around to look at me - sensing the force field. “Unfortunately” it only lasted about 5 hours, this experience of true home. Our home. Nothing outside can compare to it, and the longing remains. I am very thankful for that. It is love that heals. 

“Death is not natural for Siddhas”

Pal Pandian

Chance of a lifetime

The path of the Siddhas is one of love and grace, and they are immortals.

But we all are still confronted with our mortality. Everybody has family members, relatives, friends who have already passed away. In my own life, I have even lost three friends through suicide. Visiting a graveyard, we find dead bodies of all ages. We never know when our time is up.

Whereas for most spiritual traditions, merging with the Absolute/God is the goal, for Siddhas, this is only half of the way. Fully embodying it in the human form is the other half.

Ancient techniques to awaken to our pure Self are now being open-heartedly revealed to us by Pal Pandian’s Siddha lineage. That so much formerly hidden knowledge is revealed to mankind at this time might be owed to necessity. But it is pure grace.

We all get a tremendous opportunity with these practices to uncover who we really are.

Will I use my time wisely, before it is up?
Will you?

May Arunachala Shiva, who is also considered as the first Siddha, bless us all and hold us in his Jyothi!

May we become receptive to the grace which is always there.

May Shirdi Sai Baba shower his mercy always on all souls.

We are all children of the Divine.

Arunachalam!